And, Looking Up

by Bowsprit

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Alex Ayal
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Alex Ayal These songs are still stuck in my head years after I first heard them. A really special album. Favorite track: Promises / Edmund Tyrone.
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released July 26, 2012

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Bowsprit Greensboro, North Carolina

Original music of Samuel Silverstein
email me for booking or conversation or bad advice: samuelpa@live.unc.edu

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Track Name: Nocturne
Sometimes my feelings line up with all that i see. And if you were to feel those things too it would be more than Robert Frost could ever do. I had a dream once i looked up and there were fireworks. And when i woke up everything was geometric. And i wondered how i am supposed to balance day and night. When everything seems to come in measurements. I had a dream last night my mother drove us into a lake. And we both died trying to get out the window. And i don't know what it means bu ti think that it is beautiful.
Track Name: Ode to the Natural World
I remember when we explored the forest. you looked so natural with the trees. We may as well have been in wilderness. We were I think. So i listen to the subtleties. The shaking sweep of sweet beauty. I know. Under gradient majestic skies. Should I thank you or apologize? I know. We should broaden our scope. We should open the window. We should broaden our scope. We should open the window. To the devastating mass and plastic time to stay and pass. I hope. That what we feel transcends it all and what we think is only small. I know. No wyou feel so far away. You feel so far away.
Track Name: Edward Morgan
I like that your thoughts are noble. I like that your thoughts are yours. I want to learn to understand hatred. I want to let myself be coarse. I want to live like Edward Morgan. I want to learn to be gentle. I want to live like Edward Morgan. I want to learn to live in Poetry. The flowers don't spend their time waiting for Spring to come to erupt. They need time in peaceful solitude and i hope they are given enough. I want to live like Edward Morgan. I want to learn to be gentle. I want to live like Edward Morgan. i want to learn to live in Poetry. She was no dazzling executante; her runs were not at all like strings of pearls, and she struck no more right notes than was suitable for one of her age and situation. Nor was she the passionate young lady, who performs so tragically on a summer's evening with the window open. Passion was there, but it could not be easily labelled; it slipped between love and hatred and jealousy, and all the furniture of the pictorial style. And she was tragical only in the sense that she was great, for she loved to play on the side of Victory. Victory of what and over what-- that is more than the words of daily life can tell us. But that some sonatas of Beethoven are written tragic no one can gainsay; yet they can triumph or despair as the player decides, and Lucy had decided that they should triumph. (Chapter 3, A Room With A View, by E.M. Forster) There were some things i would've like to say to you about how its difficult to stay me and all about those funny ways you would show up in my dreams. I want to live like Edward Morgan. I want to learn to be gentle. I want to live like Edward Morgan. I want to learn to live in Poetry.
Track Name: Fears
We won't remember our struggles in ten to fifteen years. So lets fall in love, follow our hearts and forget all our fears. i would get on my bike. i would ride to your house as soon as you wanted me too. I would get on my bike and i would ride to your house just as soon as you wanted me to.
Its what I'm so scared of.
Making solid out of everything that i love.
Track Name: A Moment's Thought
If I was another
I think i'd be
a wistful flying leaf

free from all decisions
by the whimsical breeze
and lovely flowing stream

I would
I'd be so
Naive

and if i was another
i think i'd be
some kind of abstraction

in formless existence
i'd sing freely
in the softness of your sheets

There is profundity in silence
but do you see it?
I hope I notice

There is strangeness in the winds
that toss and turn us
in and out of sync

I scream out to transcendence
without understanding
that if i was another
I'd have nobody.
Track Name: Nothing Really Ever Changes
In the summertime when your heart reaches for sunlight and your mind wanders off to better places. I hope i'll be up there with the sun letting go of everyone, only wishing with you. I know that I'm more than a shadow, then why do i feel like a shadow when i'm all alone? In the wintertime when the frost clings to your front lawn and the sky is riddled with moving stars. Fingertips' forever-moments always sinking endlessly into my unmoving heart. I know that I'm more than a shadow, then why do i feel like a shadow when i'm all alone?In the autumn when my November guest is present and you are just a fleeting wishful thing, i know my longing will never rot, i know your fingertips are forgotten i'll always listen when you sing. I know that I'm more than a shadow, then why do i feel like a shadow when i'm all alone?
Track Name: Summer's Empty Envelopes
Linger on your pale blue eyes. Deep beneath, summer skies. All i know is i want to be all you want me to be. Expectations tend to deceive, leaving me to my overly optimistic dreams. All i know is i want to be all you want me to be.
Track Name: Let the Wind Blow
City's stagnant surface, breathe please. Let the drapes hang lightly. Let the people's shiny shoes hold sun-touched toes. Let the wind Blow. Let the wind blow. City's stagnant surface breathe please. I wish i could tell myself I'll never be alone. I wish you were home all summer. Endless vertically, stairs climb and climb and climb. Leading to hallways of infinite wall paper. Rooms to work in, rooms to love in loves to hold and let go of. People's perpetual schedule. I wish i could tell myself i'll never be alone. I wish you were home all summer. May i see the buildings as pyramids, erected by and ancients and tendered by the taps of busy shoes moving forward always forward. To the white beds of hospital rooms and further even still. Miles to go before i sleep. Miles to go before i sleep.
Track Name: Sometimes, I'll look at you or think about you and I'll feel like this.
I'm not always solid. Sometimes I'm air. You live in my fingertips. And you live in my leg hair. I always just. think of you. When weight pulls me down. You pull me through. I always just think of your tip toes electrical towers and kissing your nose. Sometimes math class feels like some strange way to die. So ill picture your freckles to help me get by. And if you were to see some book or a song or somethign simpler to help you get a long. I am only somethign strange Sometimes you are just so fleeting. An di hope to see you at the soonest possible moment of the soonest possible day. If time transcends and dictates beautiful and unrestrained love that is to say.
Track Name: Promises / Edmund Tyrone
Even though i made myself promise, i'd always love in truth and honesty, i would have been wrong to have promised you and now i'm stuck against myself. but still i think, i am lost, but still i am trying to forget you. Now i dream that you are closer. god knows that i could use it still i wish i could have promised you. an dwe can keep each other still. still theres one thing i can promise you. I'll run until my legs give in. I'll chase passion like theres nothing else. And so I'll never stop screaming. (passage from Long Day's Journey into Night, 1962, directed by Sydney Lumet, Written by (the wonderful) Eugene O'neill)